Welcome to Antaris-Land!!!!!

What? Too many exclamations? :)

So how is the world turning for me now?

Mostly .... great, to be honest.

Ok, the guild was a waste of time, but then I was only in it a signature with no serious consideration of staying anyway, but it was like a competition to see how many noobs you can fit into one place. Or maybe to see if the world collapses in on itself if too many of them are put in the same place at the same time. To summarise, I've left, the fact I've put on 17 levels in the time it's taken the GM (A hunter) to put on 2. I'm not saying he's useless, but I could probably roll a hunter and level it to 70 before he gets there.

I've slightly altered my talent build, eliminating some things that are more PvP, and making allowances for the 2.3.2 changes. I'm enjoying the change for the most part, it's like a weird combination of rogue and mage in terms of control of abilities, and I think I'm still coming to grips with some of the abilities. It still makes me laugh when people group with me and start shouting at me to heal. "I've run out of bandages, guess again" :P Truth is I can heal okay, and weirdly I'd probably make a reasonable back up at 70 with an allowance for Spell Damage/Healing factored into gearing. I'm never gonna be a great healer, but I'll probably have enough to tip the scales in a fight. But, DPS is what I'm about. Am I totally comfortable with every little nuance of the Retadin. No, but I'm slowly getting there. Figuring out which Seals to Judge seems to be a very hit or miss affair, a lot of a Retadin's DPS comes from SoC and that can have a really weird proc rate. Some fights it doesn't happen, other fights it happens every hit. I'm happy with some of the scary crits I can already bang down, considering the rubbish gear I have. I've managed to push a double crit (melee and SoC) out to about 1.3k (450 & 850). That should slowly creep up as I get better and better gear.

So, the big question is, what am I trying to achieve here?

I guess I never really thought in terms of long term goals. I just wanted a break from the place I was at on Khadgar, where I was pretty much at the point of just leaving the game totally it had become that much of a chore. I needed to put "wind back into my sails" so to speak. To find a reason to play, and just enjoy the basics the game has to offer. I guess one thing that I'd forgotten and maybe Hellgate brought back was my competitive streak, the side of me that once played UT, Quake, CS and even Kingpin online in Clans. The part of me that still wants to feel the fire that PvP brings, while not necessarily going back to it. Hellgate wasn't PvP, but suddenly I had the adrenaline rush that's been gone for a while, it was just being pushed to the extremes and fighting your way back. Knowing that you could rely on everyone around you to do their job, so you could concentrate on yours. It's been a while since I felt that in Warcraft, of recent times it's been more a case of knowing what mistakes everyone will make so that you can make allowances.

So, I'm better than everyone else?

Hell, no. I make my fair share of mistakes. I'm not as good at my job as I'd like to be, and there are times, when I feel I've let myself down in instances. I try to adapt and learn though. Renvik and Morwena both changed builds to become more effective at what they do. It worked for the most part, but again it's not perfect. I just don't see that same level of drive in everyone. Maybe that's the hardcore gamer in me, playing to win, not playing purely for fun, and I guess we are all different. It all comes down to this one single immutable fact ...

You can only share a common vision, with people who see things the same way as you.